The Nurtured Heart Approach (NHA) is a profoundly beneficial way of parenting.  Developed by Howard Glasser, M.A. and Jennifer Easley, M.A., this parenting style focuses on bolstering children, empowering them, building their self-confidence…nurturing them in a very real, non-saccharin-sweet “good job, honey” way.  The NHA validates and acknowledges children in a respectful, positive way.  When I use this parenting approach with my children, it works phenomenally well.  Try it out.

Visualize your child thriving using the NHA.  See them being respectful, thoughtful, accomodating, nurturing, tolerant, appreciative, attentive, focused, optimistic, joyful.  Visualize your son putting the dishes away.  See your daughter helping her little brother in the playroom.  Envision your baby sleeping blissfully, cooing, smiling, alert and content.  Visualize your teenager being happy, active, loving, caring, thriving socially and academically.

Combine the NHA with visualization and you and your child will shine and serve as role models to others!

Another useful resource is my friend and children’s guidance counselor and school social worker, Sue Heflin, M.Ed., LCSW.  If you are in the central North Carolina area, or would consider long-distance consulting and would like parent coaching with an emphasis on the NHA, visit Sue Heflin’s web site, APACE Consulting.

If you would like more information on how to reach your parenting goals, please email Melinda Easterling at Melinda@OlivesandTulips.com.

Release and relax with this quick guided meditation…

Deep breathing is vital to restoring balance in the body.  Practicing diaphragmatic breathing, or belly breathing, is an excellent way to relax, restore and rejuvenate.  When your body and mind are relaxed, you make better decisions, you are creative, you are insightful, you are more inspired and you are healthier overall.  There are numerous breathing techniques to choose from.  Here are two that I practice regularly.

Andrew Weil calls this breathing technique the relaxing (4-7-8) breath.

“Sit or lie comfortably with your back straight and place your tongue in what is called the yogic position:  Touch the tip of your tongue to the back of your upper front teeth and slide it up until it rests on the ridge of tissue between your teeth and palate.  Keep your tongue there for the entire exercise.

Exhale completely through the mouth, making an audible whoosh sound.

Close your mouth lightly.  Inhale through your nose quietly to the count of four.

Hold your breath for the count of seven.

Exhale audibly through your mouth to the count of eight.  If you have difficulty exhaling with your tongue in place, try pursing your lips.

Repeat steps 3 through 5 three more times, for a total of four cycles.  Breathe normally and observe how your body feels.  Practice this exercise at least twice a day, preferably when you first wake up and before you go to sleep.”

Another helpful breathing technique is quadrant breathing, or four corner breathing.  Try this while sitting at your desk.  The idea is to focus on an object nearby that has four corners.  Look at the monitor on your computer, your notebook or even a window.

Let’s use the computer example.

Begin by focusing on the upper left corner of the screen.  Inhale for a count of 4.
Then, focus on the upper right corner.  Hold your breath for a count of 4.
Look at the lower right corner of the monitor.  Exhale for a count of 4.
Finally, concentrate on the lower left corner, while repeating the word relax.  Repeat this three or four times. 

Next time you’re waiting in a long line or a deadline is approaching or someone is telling you something you don’t want to hear, notice your breath.  Are you breathing rapidly?  Are you holding your breath?  Is your breathing shallow…in your chest?  Notice your body.  Are your arms tense?  Are the muscles in your face tense?  Relax through deep breathing.  Try Andrew Weil’s approach.  This has helped me many, many times to relax and let go.

The more regularly you practice deep belly breathing, the more benefit you will derive from it.

To learn more on how to create the life you want, contact Melinda Easterling at melinda@olivesandtulips.com.

Use visualization to begin a new exercise program or enhance your current workout routine…

How to Use Visualization for Exercise

You can use visualization to start your own business, grow your company and increase your earnings…

How to Use Visualization to Start Your Own Business

Find out how you can even find a pet through visualization…

Use Visualization to Realize Your Goals and Desires

Watch how you can improve your parenting style and your children’s behavior using visualization…

Visualization for Parents

Do what inspires, energizes, and thrills you…

What does your perfect day look like?  I heard someone talk about this once; I thought it was brilliant, so I’m sharing it with you.  The idea is to write it out.  Get a piece of paper, get inspired and start writing.  Describe every moment of your perfect day from the minute you wake up until the second you fall asleep that night.  In June, I dove in…and loved it.  I was so inspired while doing it that I wrote three of them related to three very typical days I have each week.  I was hooked.  It is so much fun.  Your mood soars while you’re brainstorming.  But don’t say, “Well, I’m not going to write this, even though I’d love to do it, because it could never happen.”  Go all out.  Dream it.  Whatever you would love to do, write it.  You could write a page about your dream vacation day, your ideal ‘normal’ Monday through Friday, your favorite Saturday.  Do whatever inspires you.  I would encourage you to write as many as you can.  It’s worth the high you get during the process.  Then go back and reread at least one a day.  If you suspend your disbelief and allow yourself to believe that you can have what you want, these things will slowly begin coming your way.  It’s remarkable.  Here’s an example from one of mine:  I’m visualizing practicing yoga, one path to emotional balance.  Several weeks pass.  I haven’t read my ”Perfect Day” in a while (not following my own advice), but I feel compelled one day to invite my friend to a yoga class; then another friend invites me to one.  Weeks later I feel drawn to research yoga moves on-line.  Four weeks ago, my husband suggests we buy tapes including a yoga session.  And this is without having told anyone what I’d written.  Wild!!

What do you want?  If you believe you can have it, the universe (or whatever you feel comfortable calling it) makes it happen for you.  Before I launched my web site, I wrote about it as though I was already working on my site…and here we are.  Many other wonderful things have transpired since my ‘perfect day’ run.  I know you’ll find writing about your perfect day just as fulfilling.  Remember to write in the present tense, as though you are living what you’re writing.  Believe it.  Know it.  And it will be yours!

To learn more on how to create the life you want, contact Melinda Easterling at melinda@olivesandtulips.com.